Suzy

This story involves sexual interactions between boys and girls, and between two brothers, below the age of consent. If you're offended by the subject matter, or if your jurisdiction prohibits this kind of literature, please read no further. The author does not condone any illegal actions.

 ****

"Hello, Cam. What are you up to?"

I was a little startled by the question, just for a moment, because I'd thought I was alone, but the voice, and the perennially smiling face of its owner, instantly improved my lacklustre, rather bored mood. I'm Campbell, by the way, named for my Scottish grandfather who died while my mum was pregnant with me.

"Suzy! I din't expect to see you here, I thought you would've been in your garden with the boys, now you've got a paddling pool."

"You must be joking! Have you seen it?" I responded in the negative. "It's about the size of a bird bath! The terrible two are welcome to it!"

'The boys' were our respective 10 year old brothers, James, in her case, and Joey (Philip Joseph, in full, but he'd never liked his first name) in mine, inseparable best friends at school as well as at home, and, to be fair to them, they weren't terrible, at all - mischievous scamps, to be sure, but neither of them had a malicious bone in their bodies.

"James said he thought it wasn't....suitable for me!" I laughed. Although I was barely 13, my birthday had been in the last week of term, prior to the long summer break, I was almost six feet tall (I was already two inches taller than my dad, and eight inches taller than my mum!) and, unfortunately, rather overweight, albeit not to the extent I'd ever been considered obese. My size did attract a lot of verbal abuse from my peers, though - 'The Hulk' was one of the more printable pejoratives - but I was never physically bullied, given my stature. "So what are going to do instead?" I asked the girl.

"Have you seen the houses that they've been knocking down?" 

"Yeah, but not for a week or so. Have the demolition men finished with them?"

"Mostly, but all of the garages are still standing. Shall we see if there's anything interesting inside of any of them?"

"If you like."

Ordinarily, I would never have interacted with a girl, in any shape or form, but Suzy (Susanna, in full) was the exception that proved the rule. She was two school years younger than me, but due to where our birthdays fell, mine in mid-July, hers in mid-September, when she was going to be 12, it meant that I was only 14 months older than her. Our families had been close all of our lives, and as well as James and Joey, the two of us both had sisters, 14 year old Hayley for her, while I had 12 year old Lisa as well as the baby of the family, Charlie (Charlotte on the dotted line), who was 6. Apart from my little sister, who I adored, neither Suzy or I got along with the other female members of the crew. Hayley was, in her sister's words, 'a blonde bimbo, and as thick as two planks', while Lisa outrightly hated me, especially when she failed her grammar school entrance exam and had been consigned to the local 'secondary modern' at the end of our road. The relationship between Lisa and I, which had never been warm at the best of times, deteriorated to the point that we almost never even spoke to each other, unless it was unavoidable. Suzy, on the other hand, was attractive, in a boyish way, friendly, and most importantly in my eyes, extremely intelligent and easily the best conversationalist I knew personally. In short, girl or no girl, she was arguably my best friend. But only a friend, at that point, I'd honestly never thought that she could've been more. We were part of the same extended family, for want of a better phrase, although there was no blood relationship there at all, and I considered her, in so far as I considered the situation at all, as another sister. But that was to change very soon, on that blazingly hot Saturday afternoon in 1975.

We walked towards the garages that Suzy had mentioned, and there was no sign of anyone else in the vicinity. Everyone had better - or perhaps cooler - things to do, it seemed. And for at least for the first half an hour, they appeared to be correct. The first three or four garages were thoroughly unpromising, containing nothing beyond miscellaneous rubbish. The next, however, looked much more hopeful, as I peered into its grimy windows.

"There's a load of furniture," I told Suzy, who wasn't tall enough to investigate herself. "It looks like that someone has used it as a den, there's a big sofa and some other chairs as well."

"Can we get inside?"

I tried the side door, but it was evidently locked. It was pretty rickety looking, though, so I applied my ample frame to bear. Bingo! 

"Well done....Hulk!" Suzy smirked. She yelped as I lightly swatted her skinny behind. "Ow, you bully! You're supposed to be my friend!"

"And you're supposed be mine, too! You know I don't like to be called names like that!"

The girl grinned good-naturedly. "I couldn't resist the temptation!" She looked around at the musty space. "Doesn't look as though anyone's used this place any time recently."

"You're right there!" I gingerly lowered myself into one end of the sofa. "It's solid enough," I observed, "and pretty comfortable, too. Have a go!" She did my bidding, bouncing her much slighter body into the cushions.

"Nice! We could have a nap in here, if we wanted!"

"Why, are you tired?"

"A bit - it's been hard to sleep at night lately, with it being so hot. And Hayley snores like a pig, sometimes!"

I giggled. "Could be worse - Joey's farts are lethal! And he does it deliberately, all the time, just to wind me up!"

 "James' speciality is mooning me, or even waving his dick around, when he gets the chamce, the little sex maniac!"

 "Really?! Joey never does anything like that, at least not from what I've seen. He's very body shy, Mum says, I haven't seen him in the nude since he was about 6 or 7. Dad had to sort out a bolt on the door before Joey would even get into the bath."

"Not like my brother, then! He's always playing with his....boy bits, and half of the time, he doesn't bother with closing his door. It's a miracle he hasn't been caught by Mum! She'd go mental if she knew!" Suzy giggled at the thought. "I don't mind, though - it's kind-of cute, in a way. Not that he's very big 'down there', his dick is only about two and a half inches long, but it gets so hard, it's like a mini stick of rock!" 

"How do you know that!" I gaped incredulously.

"Oops, I've spilled the beans, haven't I?"

"I don't know - maybe, I guess."

"If I tell you the full story, you won't tell on me, would you? Or think I'm weird?"

"N....no, you're my best friend, I wouldn't want you to be in trouble, for sure. Or James, for that matter, I like him too, he's fun, most of the time."

Suzy looked at me, in an unwontedly serious way, before sighing deeply.

"James and me....we play sexy games together, sometimes. Not very often, because we hardly get any privacy, but we both really like to play with each other, it feels so good. I like it the best when he starts soft, it's so exciting when I can make him hard, it's like a flower growing. He really likes the feelings, too, he moans and groans, and when he comes off, he whimpers like a little puppy. It's mega cute! He hasn't got any sperm yet, so he can do it three or four times in a row without getting soft. He's not that keen on doing it for me, when I get wet, it grosses him out a bit - he thinks I'm peeing on him, I reckon - but he's a little trooper, most of the time, so I usually get a come as well."

"Wet?" I said, in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"You don't know how girls work, do you, Cam?"

I blushed furiously. "N....no, not really. Sorry," I mumbled in embarrassment.

Suzy scooted towards me, wrapping her right arm over my shoulders. "Don't get upset, Cam, If you don't know about girly things, I'll teach you. I didn't know much about boys, until James and I started to....experiment. And I found a good sex education book in the public library a year or so ago, as well. Knowledge is power, so they say!" I laughed, rather sheepishly. "So what do you think, shall we have a little 'show and tell' moment?!"

I swallowed nervously. "Do you think....we should? If it goes wrong, I could lose you as a friend, and I never want to do that. You're....special, Suzy, very special to me."

"Awww, Cam, you're so sweet!" I gasped as she kissed my cheek, my first ever kiss, beyond my family members. "I really like you, too, you're....different from the boys I've come across, you're kind and thoughtful. And mega clever, of course! If you don't want to anything....sexy with me, you don't have to. But....I think we would be good together. What do you reckon?"

"C....can we just talk about things, first? So I can get used to the thought of....being close to you, that way? I....I'm scared, if I'm being honest, I hope you don't think I'm a wuss."

The girl kissed me again, making me shiver. "Whatever suits you, Cam. If anything is too....intense for you, just tell me. And I'll to the same for you, I promise."

We snuggled together, talking quietly for maybe twenty minutes, Suzy giving me a basic lesson about female anatomy, including the mysterious 'wetness' that had so confused me.

"I'm wet right now, Cam, talking about sex things does that for girls. Just like a boy having a hard-on, it's the same process, sort-of. I can show you, if you want."

I shuddered at the prospect, my stomach full of butterflies. "I....if you didn't mind...." My voice trailed off.

She smiled at me, with real warmth and compassion. "Not at all. And you don't have to show me anything in return. Unless if you want to, of course!" she grinned.

Without any further ado, she shucked her shorts, revealing her white panties, which were obviously damp, before denuding her lower body completely, apart from her socks and plimsolls. I was entranced in a moment - she was completely hairless between her legs, but that didn't bother me in the slightest. 

"Have a good look, Cam, I don't mind at all. I'll show you how it all works in a minute!"

She was as good as her word, pointing out the various parts, giving me the correct words as well as a selection of slang terms. I was particularly rapt when her forefinger totally disappeared into her vagina.

"I love the feeling of something inside my pussy!" Suzy said breathily. "You've got longer fingers than me, would you to that for me, please?"

I was starting to become a little more comfortable with our interactions, but the thought of my actually touching her intimately was intimidating, to say the least.

"I....I don't know, I'd be heartbroken if I hurt you."

"Please, Cam, I'll show you what to do, promise. Just be gentle, I'm really wet and slippery inside, so that makes it a lot easier. If James can do it, I'm sure you can too, only better!"

"O....OK, but tell me straight away if I do anything wrong, I mean it!"

Suzy leant over and kissed me once more, but fully on the lips this time. I could hardly breathe, I was so excited. After a timeless moment, she drew away, a little. "I love you, Campbell Parker! You're the greatest! Make me feel wonderful, I can't wait any longer!"

She guided my finger into the perfect position, and within seconds, my digit was enveloped by her tight, wet and hot passage.

"That's awesome, Cam, feels so, so good! Go in and out, halfway or so. Yeah, that's it, oh Cam, you're a star! More, much more!" After little more than two minutes, she was panting rapturously.

"Don't stop, Cam, you're going to give me a huge come, any second! Keep going, please, please!"

I had no intention to stop, given that she was so obviously close to heaven. And then she was there, with a strangled scream, her vagina, pulsing wildly, grabbing my finger like a vice. I'd had numerous orgasms since learning how to do it (from a book in one of my cousin's bookshelf, typically for me!) nine months or so earlier, but I'd never had an orgasm remotely like the one that Suzy was enjoying. It went on and on, she was almost sobbing at the end, before the fireworks gradually died down, and she weakly whispered that was it was time for a break.

"Oh my God, Cam, that was the best come of my whole life! If that was your first time, I've no idea how good you could be, with a bit of practice! Awesome, with a capital 'A'! Give me a quick breather, then I'll do something good for you, too. As long as you want to, of course!" We kissed, gently, almost chastely, three or four times, but Suzy's recovery was swift, and it was evident that she was raring to go once more. I jumped when she firmly squeezed my rigid erection. 

"You've got a nice one, Cam," she cooed. "Can I see it, please?" I nodded, briefly, nervously, and she pulled my shorts down without delay. She paused for a second, her hands on the waistband of my underpants, giving me a last chance to change my mind, but I nodded once more, and the die was cast. I'd rarely seen any other boys' endowments, but what little I had seen, in school changing rooms and the like, I believed I was a bit below average in both length and breadth. Suzy didn't seem to mind, though. "Mmmm, Cam, I like it! A lot! Can I touch you, please?"

"If you want to, but I'm pretty....excited at the moment, if you play with it very much, I'll probably....make a mess."

"You mean make sperm, right?" 

"Y....yeah. And I'm not joking, it can get really messy!"

Suzy grinned wolfishly. "Bring it on! Just give me a few seconds warning!"

In the circumstances, I decided to take my shirt off, to avoid any suspicious stains when I got home, which didn't upset the girl in the slightest.

"Goody, even more of you to admire! Do you want me to do the same? I haven't got much in the way of boobs yet, but James likes the way I look." Without waiting for an answer, she peeled her shirt off immediately. She was simply gorgeous, to my eyes, and I couldn't but help saying so. "You're just flattering me, you naughty boy!"

"I'm not, Suzy, I really mean it! I'm so lucky to see you like this. You're far too good for a fat ogre like me!"

She slapped my arm, not to the degree that I was in genuine pain, but enough to make a point. "If I thought you were an ogre, I wouldn't be here! I wasn't joking when I said I love you just now! I want to be your girlfriend, if you will have me." Her eyes searched mine, in hope, it seemed to me.

"Oh Suzy, in a heartbeat! I love you too, and I have for ages, but I was afraid if I said anything like that to you, you would've run away screaming!"

"Never! So can we, then, be boyfriend and girlfriend, I mean?"

"Oh yes, yes please, even if I'm still thinking that this is a lovely dream, and I'm afraid I'll wake up in a few minutes!"

She took my penis in hand, caressing me slowly and carefully. "Does this feel like a dream?!"

I gasped in pleasure. "Noooo! It's heaven!"

"Good! Just enjoy, OK?"

I tried my best to make it last, but it was never going to happen. "Suzy! I'm going to come! R....right now!" She nudged my erection upwards so it was aiming towards my stomach, and I simply exploded. To that point, I'd never produced too much semen, so this climax was an all-time record for me. At least five strong spurts, and a few more little dribbles at the end. My skin, and Suzy's hand, was plastered! "Oh sweetie, that was the best ever! Thank you, thank you so much!"

The girl smirked. "You weren't fooling, when you said it was messy! It was really fun, though, to see you squirt like that!" She sniffed at the unfamiliar aroma curiously. "It smells a bit like swimming pools." To my complete surprise, she licked a few drops of my ejaculate off of her fingers. "Doesn't taste too yucky, either. I don't think I would want to swallow the lot, though!" She looked around, as if to look for something to wipe herself on. There were a couple of small cupboards at the side of the garage, so Suzy gravitated towards them. "Oh good, a tea towel! Two, actually. Catch!" We cleaned ourselves a little, before resumed our earlier positions on the sofa, cuddling close together, albeit more or less naked now. Before long, my spent penis began to take an interest. With Suzy's able assistance, I was fully erect once more.

"Cam?"

"Hmmm?"

"Do you think....we could....have sex? All the way sex, I mean. Your dick inside my pussy?"

The butterflies were instantly back, but this time they were the size of eagles. "I....I don't know. What if you got pregnant?"

"I can't yet, I've never had a period. Shall we try, Cam?"

I was in an agony of temptation versus trepidation. "I....think I want to, but it's so scary, as well. I really, really don't want to risk hurting you. I'm not that big, you know that already, but your pussy was really tight when I put my finger inside you. I don't know if it would work."

"I've put two of my fingers inside before, and I tried with a chunky marker pen, too, a few times. That hurt a bit at first, but I got used to it pretty quickly. Let's try, boyfriend! If it's too sore, or if you don't like it, we can go back to fingers again. We know that works, don't we! What do you think?"

"O....OK....girlfriend! What's the best position for us, do you think?"

"Well....you're quite a bit bigger and heavier than me, so what about if you lie on your back, and I'll ride on you, like a jockey!" Her eyes were sparkling, and she was grinning like the proverbial Cheshire Cat. I certainly didn't have any better ideas, so we orientated ourselves accordingly. She guided the head of my penis into the cleft of her vulva, so closely that I could easily feel her moist heat against me.

"I think it's in the right place, sweet. You put it inside, I'm pretty clumsy, and it'll mean that you can control everything." She nodded, looking rather nervous. "Please, Suzy, please, tell me the second if it's hurting you. If it does, I want to stop, straight away. I love you. I don't want pain to be involved, at all."

The girl kissed me, deeply. "I promise, Cam. I know you would never hurt me on purpose. I want this to work properly, for both of us. I'm ready now, are you ready too?" I assented. "Here goes, then."

She edged forwards, a millimetre at a time. Almost imperceptibly, it seemed, I could feel the wetness creeping over the head of my penis, making me moan with quiet pleasure.

"It feels fantastic, Suzy. Are you OK, so far?"

"Mmmm, yeah!" She wriggled me into her tightness a little further. "It's working, Cam, I can feel you inside me. It's delicious! Ten times better than that pen, for sure! Help me, please, I want to go deeper!"

I tried a short and gentle thrust of my own, making the girl flinch momentarily. I stopped instantly. She reassured me without delay.

"Don't worry, it's not painful, honestly, you're just making my pussy feel really full." As if in additional confirmation, she shimmied even closer, so that my penis was more or less halfway inside of her. "Oh darling Cam, it's so good! Way better than I ever expected! I want more, lots more!" I could've said the same, and having had a massive orgasm a mere thirty or so minutes earlier, I wasn't close to climaxing, at least not at that moment, despite the breathless excitement of our first time together. Another half inch deeper, then another. Suzy was getting really worked up, I could feel the spasmodic pulses building within her lubricious sheath. "Cam, you're going to make me come! Go in and out, right now! Oh God, it's happening!"

I threw caution to the wind, and started to pump my hips as strongly and quickly as I could manage. Suzy squealed loudly in her rapture, and her tight vaginal walls grabbed my boyhood fiercely, taking me to the utmost pinnacle of joy. I came and came, I couldn't even count how many times the spasms rocketed through my groin, it was just mind-blowingly wonderful. At length, the pryotechnics tapered off, leaving us both panting for breath. 

"Oh Cam, my darling, that was the best feeling of my whole life! Can you keep your dick inside me, please, unless it's too sensitive for you, that book said that it happens for boys and men sometimes, after they come."

"M....my dick is tickling a lot," I replied weakly, "but if you keep still for a minute or two, I think it'll be alright. I don't think I'm going soft any time soon, at least."

"Yeah, I can feel that your dick is still really hard!" She grinned wickedly. "Brilliant! Maybe we can do it again! I definitely don't want to stop yet!"

With the resilience of youth on our side, round two wasn't too far away. This coupling was very different, compared to the frantic intensity of its predecessor, slow, gentle and loving, fifteen minutes of blissful togetherness, to the extent that both of ended up crying, happy tears, for sure, but tears nonetheless, when was it all over.

"That was....I don't even know what it was," Suzy sniffled. "Whatever it was, I want to make it happen, again and again, forever, I hope. But not right now, my pussy is worn out! And I'm really gooey, as well! Can we go back to cuddling for a while, please?"

Indeed we could, and did. We even dozed, for ten minutes or so, but although neither of us were wearing watches, we knew our special first time was drawing to a close. 

"We need to think about going home, Suzy," I said. "And I bet we both really smell of sex!" I considered our options. "If we go to my house, we can use both toilets at the same time," - we had a downstairs closet, with a small washbasin, as well as the upstairs 'family bathroom' - "Joey will still be at yours, I bet, and I think Mum and Lisa were going to take Charlie to the big park. Dad will be snoozing, he was working earlies this morning, so we might get away with everything. Fingers crossed!"

Fortune did indeed favour the brave, and we were able to freshen ourselves up before any other family members realised we'd even arrived. My girl - what a thrill for me to use that phrase! - and I were draining large glasses of orange squash in the kitchen when my dad emerged from the front room.

"I'm not surprised you two were thirsty," the man observed. "It's as hot as hell outside! You haven't been in the full sun all afternoon, have you?"

"No Dad, we've been in the shade, most of the time." I thought Suzy was about to laugh out loud, but she contained herself, barely. "We've just been talking, really. Like you said, it's been too hot to run about much."

"That sounds sensible - I hope your brothers have done likewise, but I'm not holding my breath in expectation. I wouldn't be surprised if Joey turns up looking like a lobster!"

"I think my mum has slapped some sun cream on them," Suzy said. "And they've already got pretty good suntans."

"I suppose so - you two don't look like ghosts yourselves. Well, make sure you're careful, sunburn is no fun at all."

"We will, Dad." I glanced at the kitchen clock. "I expect tea will be in an hour or so, Suzy and I are going to see what the boys are doing, and I'll bring Joey back with me after that, OK?"

"That's fine. See you later."

We beat a hasty retreat, laughing goofily as soon as the front door was closed. "I thought you were going lose it, sweet!" I giggled again for a moment, before looking at the girl rather more soberly. "We'll need to be sensible, Suzy, I really want to do a lot more....sexy stuff with you, and I hope you feel the same, but if we get caught....well, I don't know what would happen, but I bet it would be very bad news. Especially if we accidently make a baby, that would be the end of the world." There was a large house between my home and the girl's which had been converted to council offices, and a semi-circular drive with trees and bushes obscuring the adjacent footway. Suzy took my hand and drew me into that semi-private space. We embraced and kissed tenderly, before she stepped a pace back, gazing into my eyes.

"What you've just said is exactly right. I love you, I know you love me, and I want us to have sex together as often as we can, but I don't want us to get into trouble, and I 100% certainly don't want to get pregnant. We'll have to make a plan - maybe we can go to the library on Monday, see if there any sex education books there that might help us. What do you think?"

"Great idea! And it'll be cooler in the library anyway, the weather isn't supposed to change for a while."

Suzy kissed me again. "We'll do that, then." She grinned at me, impishly. "I think we'll be safe from any baby business this weekend, though - shall we go to the garage tomorrow?!"

I beamed at her. "Oh yes, yes please!"

****

The following week, which was characterised by more cloudless and hot weather, saw Suzy and I becoming as inseparable as the 'Two J's'. We did manage to enjoy each other's bodies, more than once, but we were discreet, so that neither our siblings or, more significantly, our parents knew there was anything out of the ordinary going on. On the Thursday, though, Suzy alerted me to a potential snag, as we comfortably settled ourselves into the sofa in the garage.

"James wanted to play sexy with me this morning, Cam. I put him off, saying it was too hot and sweaty at the moment, but it was obvious that he was pretty disappointed. Now we're boyfriend and girlfriend, I want it to be just for us, but I don't want him to think that he's done anything wrong, or thinks that I don't like him anymore. I don't know what to do."

"Do you think he might tell on you?"

"I doubt it, if he says anything to Mum or Dad. or even Joey, he'd be in just as much trouble as me. And I do love him, truthfully, if it wasn't for you, I'd want to carry on with our....playtimes. It's been so much fun."

I pondered the problem. "I reckon....the best idea is just tell him the truth. Not about the sex stuff, but us being together. He's not dumb, he'll know that you can't be his long-term girlfriend. If you talk to him like a grown-up, he'll understand the situation."

"He'll be upset, though, he might even cry. He hardly ever cries, but when he does, it breaks my heart. What can I do if that happens?"

A thought suddenly occurred to me, making me grin. "What about this - bring him here, just you and him, have a nice time together, but tell him afterwards that would be the last time, because your situation has changed. I wouldn't mind, at all, like I've said before, he's a good guy, he's almost as much a brother to me as Joey is. But it's entirely your decision, if you don't want to do that, we can work something different out."

Suzy looked almost gobsmacked for a few seconds, before grinning in her turn. "You wouldn't mind, truly?"

"Nope, if I did, I wouldn't have suggested it. Joey was talking about going to the beach tomorrow, I'll take him and Charlie, and you can have some quality time with James. Deal?"

"I love you, Cam, you're so clever and so caring! Let's make it happen!"

****

It was almost 48 hours before I saw Suzy again, the hiatus was far more difficult for me than I would have anticipated just a week before. I was missing her like crazy by Saturday afternoon. When we finally got back together, in the council office driveway, we kissed for at least five minutes straight, hardly taking a breath between us. The obvious thing to do would've been go to the old garage, but Suzy thought that would've been a mistake.

"Now James knows about our 'hideout', he might be tempted to 'drop in' unannounced," she said. "Shall we go somewhere else instead?"

I considered her concerns, judging them prudent. "How about that path through the parade grounds I showed you a few weeks ago? I've found another path from there, where you can go through the grassy area between there and the cliff path. I've been there loads of times, ever since I was about 8 or 9, and I've never seen anyone around. The grass is really long there, so even if someone did appear, it's really easy to hide. It's a bit of a hike, and not as comfortable as the sofa, but it's pretty private, and it's all downhill on the way home!" The parade grounds were part of a redundant military installation, close to our town's world-famous castle, and hadn't been used since World War 2 - no doubt the area was still owned by the Ministry of Defence, but there were no 'Keep Out' signs, so the locals walked their dogs - or children! - without let or hindrance. Suzy and I easily found a nice little 'nest' amongst the vegetation for our tryst, our lovemaking was quiet and gentle, but none the less satisfying for that. Once we allowed our collective heart rate to drop to normal, I was curious about how the previous afternoon had gone. Suzy smiled mysteriously.

"Don't you think that should be private?" she said archly. I mumbled an apology, but I should've known that she was teasing me. "Don't be a goof, you! Of course you deserve to know, it was your brilliant idea in the first place! It was super fun, Cam, thank you so much for letting me do it! James was thrilled to bits, about the garage, and what we did there. He was a greedy little piglet from the start, he was so hard I was afraid he was going to hurt himself! He came four times before he was done, and he gave me two lovely cummies in between! After we'd calmed down, I told that would be the last time for us to play with each other, and why. He took it surprisingly well, really, even if he was a little bit disappointed. He tried to find out if we were 'doing it' together, but I just told him to mind his own business! He likes you a lot, Cam, he said was he was glad that I'd found a great boyfriend. I asked him to not tell anyone else yet, even Joey, so we could work how to tell us the others, especially our mums and dads, and he said he would. He's pretty good about keeping secrets, but I reckon we should work out a plan to tell the world soon."

"What about on your birthday? It's only four weeks away." I suggested. "All the family would be there, as well as some of your friends. It might be a bit nerve-racking, for both of us, but at least our parents shouldn't get too upset, on your special day."

"That sounds possible - as long we don't get caught in the meantime! Let's see what happens!"

****

The weekend we were due to go back for the new school year, our unforgettable summer ended with a bang - literally! The Saturday afternoon was almost unbearably hot and humid, with the weather forecast threatening a storm. And the forecast was right, big time - at 9:00 in the evening, more or less exactly, all hell broke loose. I've never seen such a violent thunderstorm, before or since. Joey and I sat by our bedroom window for an hour or more, enthralled at the spectacle as the sky was lit up with continuous flashes of lightning, loud claps of thunder and torrents of rain. It rained most of the Sunday, too, albeit less spectacularly, meaning that we were 'confined to barracks', so to speak, so it was Monday morning (we didn't have to go to school until the Wednesday) before all of the siblings, apart from Hayley and Lisa, ventured out to see how much damage to been done to our local patch. Disappointingly, at least for us boys, there wasn't the apocalyptic scene we'd expected. There was a personal tragedy for Suzy and I, though - a gang of workmen were busy demolishing the old garages, including our 'lovenest'. The girl and I were close to tears, and it was even worse because we weren't able to talk about our loss aloud. James seemed to realise why we were so quiet, eventually, giving Suzy a sad, secret smile at one point, the girl mouthing 'Thanks' in return. Charlie made all of us smile before too long, though, with her enthusiasm to go 'to the swings', the smaller, but closer town park being our next port of call. Charlie and the boys had plenty of fun, at least, but Suzy and I were rather glum, sitting on one of the park benches, not holding hands, that would've been too obvious, but our fingers just touching.

"It's like losing a friend," Suzy murmured. "The garage, I mean. Did you see the sofa in that big skip?" I nodded slightly. "Whatever happens, I'll never forget these few weeks, Cam, they've been so special, haven't they?"

"You're exactly right, sweet. But we'll find other special places, hopefully. Somewhere dry, in particular!" We both laughed, even if it was in a slightly bittersweet fashion.

****

Suzy's 12th birthday party was the next big item in the agenda, ten days or so later. Her actual birthday was on the Friday, but the party had been postponed by 24 hours so that all of the guests were able to attend. It was a pretty busy affair, helped by the weather being benign, so that buffet food and games were conducted in the garden, for the most part. The projected guest list had been boosted by two new arrivals into our circle - James and Joey, just into their last year at primary school, had palled up with a pair of fraternal girl twins, Jools (Julia) and Jen (Jeanette), who had recently moved into our area. It had become the '4J's' overnight! The quartet were already 'thick as thieves', as my mum described them, the girls seeming to be, at first sight, bright and fun to be with. My rather shy brother, in particular, was already coming out of his shell with the help of the sisters, it was really nice to see him being so comfortable in his own skin, for once. It was also reassuring for Suzy and I to see James being distracted by any potential thoughts of lingering jealousy after losing his 'playmate' so recently, although to be fair to him, he'd taken the new situation in his stride, as far as we could tell. 

For us, though, the weekend had left us on tenterhooks. We still wanted to tell the world about our love, but the attitudes of our parents had given us a few sleepless nights. As the guests assembled that afternoon, my girl and I had a few minutes alone, and we decided to 'rip the plaster off', and just go for it. Suzy thanked everyone for coming, and for the cards and small gifts she'd been given, before announcing something new.

"A lot of you have known Cam for ever and a day, you know we've grown up together, most of our lives. But in the last couple of months, we've realised that we've become more than just friends. We're boyfriend and girlfriend now, and we couldn't be happier." Suzy drew me close, giving me a warm, but largely chaste kiss on the cheek, and I reciprocated in similar vein. There was a ripple of applause, even a few muted cheers (most emanating from the 4Js!), but there were at least two rather stony faces in evidence - from Suzy's dad, and my mum. Well, I thought, they know now, we'll have to wait and see what happens next. 

I didn't have wait very long, in the event. As the party wound down, and the various guests left, I was in the garden, helping to tidy up, when Suzy's dad made a beeline for me. The man, James Senior, the person I'd known as Uncle Jim for as long as I could remember, stood in front of me, with a look I can only describe as menacing. I was aware of my dad being close by, monitoring developments, a comfort, to say the least, so I wasn't exactly fearful, but certainly uneasy.

"If you ever hurt my daughter," he growled, "you can be sure you'll be very, very sorry. Understand?" My dad intervened.

"Jim, if you threaten my lad like that again, you'll be the sorry one. Cam would never hurt Suzy, they're best friends, and have been for years. They're growing up, and the time has come for them to make their own decisions about who they want to associated with." Jim looked daggers at both me and Dad, before turning on his heel without another word. "Come on, Cam, I think it might be better for us to go home soon."

"I want to talk to Suzy first, please. She will need to know what's happened."

"OK, but be sensible about it - the last thing we want is for this to descend into a brawl." Dad gave me a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "She's a treasure, that girl of yours. Look after her."

"I will, Dad. I love her to bits."

I found Suzy in the kitchen, and quickly urged her to go back into the garden, so we could speak privately. 

"Are you serious, Cam - did he really threaten you?"

"That was how it felt to me, and my dad thought the same. Dad wants us to go home, straight away. He reckons there's a chance of fisticuffs. Your dad looked at me as though I was a complete stranger, and a dangerous stranger into the bargain, it was really creepy. He's always been a bit....gruff, but this was different. I bet he'll say that we can't see each other. He might even try to split James and Joey up, break up the families completely."

"Best of luck with that!" Suzy said. "They're joined at the hip! And that goes for us, too - I'll just go to yours, unless he's planning to lock me into a cupboard, or something! My mum, for one, would never agree to anything like that, in fact, both mums are really good friends themselves, and even Hayley and Lisa have been close to being best friends lately." Suzy glanced at the house, and seeing no-one near any windows, gave me a soulful kiss on the lips. "We'll be fine, Cam, I'm sure of it!" My dad reappeared, beckoning me towards the garden gate purposefully, in a way that brooked no argument. "I'll call for you in the morning, Cam, unless it's pouring with rain. We can go somewhere to talk - or even other stuff, if we get the chance! I love you, see you tomorrow."

"I love you just as much. See you soon." At least I hope so, I thought to myself.

****

The Sunday morning dawned brightly, promising another fine late summer day. Just before ten o'clock, there was a knock on the front door. My dad was quick to be the first to answer it, doubtless concerned that Uncle Jim might be on the threshold, but our visitors turned out to be not only Suzy and James, but their mum, my (honorary) Aunty Helen, as well. Dad ushered the trio into the living room, before putting the kettle on. My mum, who had been upstairs, also walked into the room, joining Joey and Charlie, who were already there, playing draughts on the carpeted floor.

"Nice to see you, Helen," Mum said. "A cup of tea?"

"Yes please, I need one! It's been a bit....fraught in the last 12 hours or so, as you might guess. Jim's been a bit of a di....handful, to say the least."

"You and the kids have been safe, though, haven't you?"

"Yes, but there have been....words. Plenty of words! I made him sleep on the couch last night, and told him if he wanted any Sunday dinner, he'd have to mend his ways, pronto!"

Mum laughed. She knew Helen was a really good cook, whereas Jim....wasn't! "Hit him in the stomach, kind of! Good move, Helen! What is he going to do now?"

"He drove off, about an hour ago. I reckon he's going to Kath's, but if he thinks he'll get tea and sympathy from her, he'll be pretty disappointed, I suspect!" Kathleen was Jim's older sister, a woman who was the epitome of 'no-nonsense'. "He'll back for dinner, if not before."

Dad brought a large tray into the living room, complete with a teapot, mugs, milk jug and sugar bowl, along with several glasses of squash for the younger contingent. "Tea or squash for you two?" he said to Suzy and I, already knowing that the boys and Charlie would want cold drinks. As the squash had already been poured, we went for the cold option as well. There was a little inconsequential adult chit-chat as we drank our beverages, making the boys restless.

"Can we go out and play, Dad?" Joey asked - the game of draughts, won by Charlie, amusingly enough, had finished.

"If you like. What about Charlie, is she included?" The boy's expressions told their own story.

"We'll take her out," Suzy replied. "We can go to the big park, she likes the aviary as well as the playground."

"Oh thank you, Suzy, you're a good'un. Make sure you're all back for dinner, please, the usual time, just after two." That applied to Dad himself, he was fond of meeting his friends for a couple of pints on Sunday lunchtime, although he was rarely exactly punctual - Mum always worked on the basis of the meal being ready at 2:30!

"Same for you," Helen told her children. "Don't be late, please, I don't want to give your father an excuse to be any more grumpy than he is already." James smirked. "I mean it, you little ratbag, two on the dot, or else!"

"I'm never late for Sunday dinner, Mum, you should know that. Your cooking is too good for that!"

"Marvellous, flattery too! Scram, you pair of rogues!"

'The Js' disappeared without further ado, giggling all the way to the front door and beyond. I took my little sister's hand gently. "Let's find your shoes, sweetpea, then we can go out as well." Five minutes later, we were ready. The adults looked as though they were going to have a more serious conversation, and that proved to be correct, as I found later, but we weren't invited to their discussion at that point, so we headed into the outside world. We passed Suzy's house on our way to the park, the girl remarking that their car was still conspicuous by its absence, but didn't say anything further, chatting to Charlie for the most part instead. The little girl, closing on her seventh birthday, due at the end of October, was her usual chirpy and energetic self, and as ever, a complete pleasure to be with. Suzy and I took turns playing with her on the swings, roundabout and rocking horse, before having a brief look at the nearby aviary. It was small, but it was one of Charlie's favourite places to visit locally. After an hour or more, we were all ready for a rest, sitting together on one of the park benches, my girl and I flanking my sister. Charlie looked at us in turn, rather inquisitively, it seemed to me.

"Now you two are girlfriend and boyfriend, do you kiss each other, like people in films?"

I glanced at Suzy for a moment, and she nodded slightly, as if to say 'just tell her the truth'.

"Sometimes, sweetpea. I really like Suzy, and luckily for me, she likes me just as much."

"Does it feel nice, to kiss like that?"

"Very nice," Suzy explained. "It's not that much different than 'family kisses', really, maybe a bit longer and stronger. It makes me feel warm inside, I like it a lot."

Charlie considered that piece of information for a few moments, her head slightly to one side, for all the world looking like one of the birds we'd been admiring a few minutes earlier.

"Lisa says....that girls and boys sometimes do other things together, too. Like....touching their....private bits. Do you two do that sort of stuff, as well?"

I cursed Lisa inwardly, it was the sort of thoughtless 'throwaway' the older girl specialised in - of course, Charlie would need to know things like that, probably sooner rather than later, but not at 6 years old. I sighed in frustration, saying nothing initially. Suzy took the initiative, instead.

"Lisa shouldn't told you things like that, not just because of your age, but because you haven't got that much experience about....personal matters. But since she's mentioned it, I think you deserve to be told the truth. If we tell you, though, we need to know that you can keep it quiet. I don't mean keep secrets for us, but this sort of stuff is supposed to be private. Do you think you can do that for us, Charlie?"

"Of course, silly! I know our mums and dads wouldn't like it, but it's none of their business!"

"Well, it's everyone's business in one way, sweetpea," I told her. "If anyone, and I mean absolutely anyone, tries to force you to do or say anything you're not happy with, you need to tell. It's not being a tell-tale, it's making sure that you're safe. I know it's complicated, but it's important, as well. Do you understand the problem Lisa has given us, Charlie."

"I....I think so. I can ask you or Suzy if I'm not sure about stuff, can't I?"

"100%, darling. I think even Joey knows some of these things too, we'll have a little chat with him soon. But I wouldn't trust Lisa with anything important, she's proved that she's not reliable, as far as I'm concerned. Anyway, now we've said that, I guess you want a few answers from us." Charlie smiled, knowingly.

"So, do you two....do stuff together?"

The three of us had an intriguing chat for half an hour or so. It seemed that Lisa had said plenty, and Charlie had been listening with interest. Added to that, James - who else! - had been displaying his wares, more than once, to the little girl (Mum was right, Suzy said, he is a little ratbag, albeit that my girl was saying those words with a wry smile). It's fun to see his willy, Charlie remarked without embarrassment, especially when he makes it grow and stick up. Suzy and I were rather more circumspect, speaking in generalities rather than specifics, and certainly not the mechanics of intercourse, or the like. All things considered, it had been an instructive little session, with Charlie, without having to be prompted, promising to keep things on the down low. After another quick stint on the swings, we went back down the hill towards our respective homes, in ample time to enjoy the mothers' culinary skills. After the meal, though, there was an unexpected development for me.

"Cam, once our food has settled, I want to have a chat with you. Privately," Dad said firmly.

"O....OK, Dad. Where and when do you want to it?"

"Oh, not anywhere far-flung - maybe on one of those seats by the river. Don't worry, you're not in trouble, but I want to give you....a little bit of advice, shall we say."

Forty minutes later, Dad and I were sitting on one of the aforementioned park benches. The man looked at me, levelly.

"You're almost a young man now, Cam, rather than a boy, and I'm impressed how mature you've become, for the most part. I would prefer if you and Lisa could get along better, but I'm well aware that she's far more at fault than you."

"She hates me, Dad, I mean it. All I want to do is stay away from her. I don't want to argue with her all the time, so not speaking to her is the simplest way to do that."

Dad sighed a little. "I know you've never been friends, and I doubt that will change as you grow up. I don't talk to Aunty Di very often, although that came about as much because of the age difference between us as anything else." My dad's only sibling was 8 years older than him, and had been living in Manchester since the late 1940s, after marrying a soldier who'd been stationed in our area - I'd only seen her on a bare handful of occasions, in my whole life. "But that's not really what I want to talk about with you. No, what I'm concerned about is your relationship with Suzy. Like I say, you're growing up before my eyes, and now you're with a very special young lady. But you two have grown up together, almost like brother and sister, and that has given a couple of people some problems. Uncle Jim, after yesterday's contretemps, and your mum. I can't lie, I made it worse this morning when I laughed out loud when Mum said you two being together was almost like incest - you know what that word means, I assume?" I nodded, feeling more than a little embarrassed. "I know, and, realistically, Mum knows just as well, that incest doesn't apply to Suzy and yourself, there's not the least drop of shared blood between you. But, and here's the advice I referred to, two of the parents are thinking along lines of being the relationship being 'inappropriate'. I don't know if you and Suzy have started to experiment with sex," I gulped, probably visibly, "and I don't want to know, it's none of my business, all I want to say is that it would be better if you can be....discreet about the matter. And, most importantly, to my mind, that Suzy doesn't fall pregnant. That would be disastrous, as far as I'm concerned."

"W....we've already discussed that, Dad," I mumbled. "Neither of us want that to happen. It would ruin everything. Suzy has told me she hasn't had a....period yet, but we're working on the basis that it would happen pretty soon."

"That's very sensible, son. And for your imformation, Aunty Helen and I have talked about it, as well. I'm pretty sure that Helen will get Suzy on the pill as soon as your girl needs it - she's done that for Hayley already, apparently. Just don't tell Uncle Jim, Helen hasn't told him, at all. If you can't be good, be careful, that's Helen's maxim!"

"We'll be careful, Dad, we promise." 

"OK, well, that's all I wanted to say. What are you planning to do for the rest of the afternoon?"

"Nothing special, I've got a little bit of homework to finish, I did most of it on Friday night, so I'll do that before teatime."

"Shall we go home, then?" Dad said with a smile.

"Yeah! Thanks for being a great dad, you're the best!"

****

Summer had come and gone, and with it, the darker evenings had drawn in. Suzy and I were seeing each other almost every day, but our opportunities for intimacy had become few and far between. The half-term holiday in the last week of October beckoned, though, particularly when the weather forecast was promising sunshine, albeit with a distinct nip in the air. Our plans were completely scuppered though, on the first Sunday of the break - Suzy had her first period that very day. And her metabolism didn't co-operate in the slightest - she wasn't physically sick, unlike Hayley, who'd had thoroughly rotten periods for the previous two years and more, but she felt nauseous for days, and didn't want to do anything much beyond lying on the sofa, wrapped in a blanket, in her living room. I tried my best to be supportive, but I felt useless, all I could do was to talk to her and hold her hand. And I couldn't do even that very often, because I was very much still persona non grata with Uncle Jim, so I could only call in when we knew for sure that he was at work. Suzy did perk up towards the end of the week, spending time at our house, where we could kiss and cuddle a little, but, as Dad had said, discretion had to be the watchword. Unlike Joey and his partner in crime, as I discovered on the Monday.

I'd been to see Suzy, while Mum and my sisters had gone on the bus to see some of our cousins in the next town. Joey had begged off from the trip, preferring to stay with James, Aunty Helen offering to look after my brother instead. The boys disappeared soon after lunch, given the reasonable weather, my suspicion being that they were going to see Jools and Jen, who lived fairly close by. I stayed for another hour, but Jim was due to come back from work any time, so I gave my girl a last kiss, and headed back home. As soon as I'd opened the front door, I could hear hushed voices upstairs. Joey had been entrusted with his own doorkey, very recently, and my only concern was that my brother wasn't going to be in trouble for being somewhere he wasn't supposed to be at that moment, even if it was his own home, so I headed up the stairs. I wasn't being unduly quiet, but it was obvious that the group of people in our bedroom hadn't heard me as I approached the open door. What I saw made me gasp. My beloved, insanely handsome brother was lying on his back on his bed, his eyes closed tightly shut, with a dreamy smile painted across his lovely features, as his three friends, none of who could see me, were pleasuring him with gusto. Jools was sucking his nipples, the left first, before switching to the right, Jen was kissing and licking his more than impressive erection, while even James, who'd always been avowedly heterosexual to my knowledge, was gently tickling Joey's olive sized testicles. It was the most erotic thing I'd ever seen, I was rigidly erect in mere seconds. My first impulse was to join in with the quartet, but I knew immediately that would've ruined the moment. I did enjoy the view for a minute or so, before creeping away as quietly as I could. Just as I got to the foot of the stairs, I heard two sharp, high-pitched whines from Joey's lips - he'd reached his peak, without a doubt. I went back outside, walked around the block, as much to calm myself down as anything else, before re-entering the house ten minutes later, this time making sure I was clearly audible by anyone who was there. The 4Js were in the living room, listening to Radio 1 on Mum's radio, all looking like butter wouldn't melt in their mouths, although Joey's cheekbones did display a subtle flush.

"Hi, gang!" I said brightly. "Been anywhere good?"

"Nah," James said, "just had a walk. We all needed to pee, and have a drink. We're taking Jools and Jen home in a few minutes."

"Fair enough." I looked at Joey in a deliberately neutral way. "I need to tell you something, just for a minute. Let's go into the kitchen." Joey looked perturbed, but did my bidding without demur. 

"You need to be more careful, J," I told him quietly. "If you bring people, even good friends, into the house without telling Mum and Dad, they might take your key away. You're only 10, after all. I didn't get my own key until I went to senior school." The boy looked at me as though there was more to say, but the conversation was over, as far as I was concerned. "That's it. Just think, OK?" 

"OK Cam. Thanks."

****

The incident was closed, or so I thought. The family gradually came together, after their diverse days, enjoying a fish and chip supper by way of our main meal, then watched the TV for a couple of hours. Joey was despatched to our bedroom at the customary time, for him, of 9:00, Lisa and I were allowed an extra hour, but the programme that my parents had chosen wasn't to my taste, so I said my goodnights and went upstairs a little after 9:15. Our bedroom was silent when I entered, my brother often went to sleep within a few minutes of changing into his pyjamas, especially if he'd had a busy day, so I assumed that he was out for the count. I didn't want to disturb him, so I changed in the bathroom, before slipping into my own bed as noiselessly as I could. Given the breathless excitement of the afternoon's events, it wasn't long before I was uncomfortably aroused, feeling the need to deal with my unruly boyhood. Since I'd been engaging with my girl, I seldom masturbated any longer, but I wasn't as though I'd made a vow of (non-Suzy) chastity, so I began to slide my fingers inside of the waistband of my sleep shorts. Until I almost jumped out of my skin.

"I'm awake, Cam."

"Joey! I'm sorry, I was trying to be quiet."

"Don't worry, you didn't do anything wrong. I want to talk to you, anyway."

"That's fine by me. We'll have to be careful, though, Lisa will be upstairs in a few minutes, and I doubt Mum and Dad will be too far behind." My brother and I only had single beds, but mine was a little larger, so I made a suggestion. "Snuggle with me, we can whisper then, if we have to. We don't need Lisa earwigging, for certain!" We'd shared my bed at least two nights a week when we were younger, Joey had been prone to bad dreams for a period, but it was probably two, or even three years since that had happened. My brother didn't say anything aloud, but it was little more than ten seconds when he padded across the floor before wriggling into my quilt.

"It's ages since we've done this, Cam, I thought you didn't like it anymore."

"I started to get a lot bigger, didn't I? And I was getting....hard-ons a lot, as well. It got embarrassing."

Joey sniggered. "Well, we've both got that problem these days! Including right now, I reckon!"

"You could be right, Joey! So what do you want to talk about?"

There was a lengthy hiatus, before the boy spoke. "You saw, didn't you? When I was....playing with James and the girls. I mostly had my eyes shut, but I sort-of....blinked a few times, and I saw you,  in the corner of my eye, by the doorway. When I looked again, you were gone."

"Oh Joey, I'm so sorry! I wasn't spying on you, honestly. I was just worried that you'd get in trouble with Mum and Dad. If I'd thought you were....doing stuff with your friends, I would've gone straight back out. I wasn't even trying to be quiet, but you guys were....too busy to notice me."

"It's alright, Cam, it was my fault. James worked out that our house was empty, and he wanted to play sexy indoors, but I should've said no. How long were you watching?"

"Not long, a minute, a minute and a half, tops."

"What did you think?"

I hesitated, for long seconds. "If I tell you the whole truth, please don't hate me."

"I'd never hate you, Cam, you're my big brother, we've always loved each other, haven't we?"

I closed my own eyes for a few seconds, before finally committing. "Watching you was the sexiest thing I've ever seen, Joey. And you're the most....beautiful person I've ever seen, too. Suzy comes very close, but you're the number one, for me. Sorry if you think I'm weird, but that's the truth. My truth."

"Wow! That's....surprising. You'd choose me instead of Suzy?"

"Not....exactly. I love Suzy, and I hope we can be together forever. But seeing you, with your amazing body, your handsome face and that dreamy smile on your lips - it was on a whole different level from anything I've seen before."

There was a another longish pause, when neither of us seemed to know what to say next. "Wait a minute, I want to try something," Joey eventually said. He slipped out of the bed, and opened his small wardrobe. "Not sure if this still works," he murmured. There was the sound of a plug being inserted, and a switch pressed. "Yes!" he said in triumph. Our room was bathed in dim light. Joey had found his old nightlight! He climbed back onto the bed. "Now you can look at me close up, if you want to. But only look, please, you touching me....down there would be too weird."

"I would never do anything that you didn't want, J, promise. 'No' means 'no', in my book."

"I believe you. So, do you want a look?"

My mouth was very dry, all of a sudden. "I....if you wouldn't mind...."

He didn't tell, he showed. Everything. He was only wearing pyjamas in any case, and they fell on the floor in mere seconds. It was the first time I'd seen him naked for more than four years, and I was enraptured. 

"Oh Joey! You're....gorgeous!" I breathed. He grinned, giving me a slow 360 degree 'twirl'. I drank his perfection in, from his tousled light brown hair to his neat little feet, but the acme was his slender, ragingly hard five inch penis, pointing almost vertically towards the ceiling.

"You like?" he giggled.

"1000%! No wonder the girls were all over you! You could be a model, with or without clothes!"

He screwed his face up amusingly. "Definitely with clothes, thank you! I almost pooed my pants, the first time I undressed in front of Jools and Jen!"

"So this afternoon's....viewing wasn't the first?"

"It was the third. The first time was in the garden shed at their house, the week after Suzy's birthday. All four of us stripped, kind-of as a dare. I didn't think I would be able to do it, but the girls persuaded me. They both look really good undressed, so I thought that it was fair for them to see me as well. And touching them, and them touching me, was fun, too, once I got used to it."

"I know what you mean, I was really nervous on my first time."

"With Suzy?"

"Yeah, I've never seen another girl undressed, apart from Lisa and Charlie when they were small."

"What about seeing boys?"

"A few in the changing rooms at school, that's all. None of them were even close to being as good-looking than you, though."

"Can I see you undressed, Cam? Please? I've seen James quite a few times, but no-one else."

"O....OK. Like you said about the girls, that would be fair. I'm not very handsome, though, and I'm not....that big either, if you see what I mean."

"It doesn't matter, James has only got a small one, but it works perfectly! He can stay hard for hours, if he gets the chance!"

I smiled, rather nervously, before disrobing slowly. Joey looked at me, expectantly. I was still completely erect, so when I took my shorts off, my brother whistled softly.

"That's not small, Cam! It might be half an inch shorter than mine, but it's at least twice as thick! I bet Suzy likes it! Let's compare!"

We knelt on the mattress, close to each other, but not touching.

"You've got plenty of hair, Cam! James says that hairy guys can make lots of sperm. Is that true? I bet you can make sperm, can't you?"

"Y....yeah, some. But not loads, usually. And like I said before, I haven't seen many boys, let alone men, so I've no idea about how much sperm they can make."

"I've never seen sperm, even in pictures. Can you show me how it works, please? It comes out when you have your sparklers, doesn't it?"

"Sparklers?"

"That's what I call the really good feelings at the end, it reminds me of sparklers on Bonfire Night! I can't make sperm yet, James reckons you have to be about 12 or 13 to do that. So will you show me yours, please?"

I was hesitant, but after a brief bout of soul-searching, I didn't see any reason to refuse. Joey looked as though he'd won the football pools.

"Brilliant! I'm going to rub mine while you rub yours, I bet it'll be awesome!"

You're not joking, I mused. Before my sexual initiation by my special girl, I was beginning to worry that I was going to be 'a queer', in the 1970s vernacular of my school, a boys-only grammar. There had been more than a few boys, almost always a year or two younger than me, who had taken my fancy, although I would never dare to do anything about it - I'd heard the scornful name-calling, and even occasional physical bullying, directed against the very few schoolmates who had supposedly been identified as 'homos'. Those qualms, though, were far from my mind at that moment, my sole focus was on the beautiful boy, already starting to breathe irregularly, as he was being grabbed by the pleasure in his loins. As for me, as I masturbated slowly, I knew I wouldn't be able to contain the flood for long, the situation was far too exciting for that.

"Joey!" I whispered urgently. "I'm nearly there!" My brother fixed his eyes onto my quaking penis, and the next moment, a long spurt of semen, then another and another, the white fluid covering the skin of my stomach.

"Oh wow, wow, wow!" Joey exclaimed, rather over volume. "I'm going to get my sparklers, too!" And, indeed, he did, with the cutest little sighs and whimpers. When he was done, and taken a few deep breaths, he smiled broadly. "That was amazing, Cam! I can't wait until I can squirt like that! And watching you getting the feelings gave me huge sparklers, too! Can we do this again, really soon?!"

"It was amazing for me as well, J! I don't usually squirt that much, you must be extra sexy!" He laughed delightedly.

"I'm ready for seconds, right now! I usually only do it once a day, but maybe I've got Cam poisoning!" He was obviously still bubbling with excitement, but, rather abruptly, his face changed. "Cam...." he said timidly, "I think....I've changed my mind. Would you....do it for me? James always says it's....queer for boys to do stuff with other boys, but that's only his opinion, isn't it? And I love you, and I know you love me, so that's not even a bit queer, that's what I think."

"If you really want to, I'd love to make you feel good, Joey. I've thought about it for ages, but I never thought it would happen, with you being so....shy about your body."

"There's a reason for that, Cam. I'll tell you why soon, but not tonight. All I want now is to do it with you. Can we, please?"

I took a risk, but it was one that I couldn't resist. I kissed him on the cheek, startling him somewhat. "We can do whatever we like, J. Let me clean myself up a bit - sperm is pretty messy, as you've seen! - but then I'll gladly give you the best feelings I possibly can."

It was my first hands-on experience with another boy, and I absolutely loved it. The fact that I could share it with my beloved brother was just the icing on the cake. I stroked and caressed his body lovingly, the feedback from him convincing me that I was doing a good job. I tried to make it last as long as I could, fairly successfully, fortunately, it was probably a good fifteen minutes before he finally squeaked 'It's happening, Cam'. Oh God, it was so erotic, feeling those big dry throbs of his between my fingers, at least ten of them, until he gasped 'Too much'. I let go at once, of course, I was more than familiar with post-orgasm over-sensitivity. He nestled close to my body, enjoying the afterglow in his young frame. Before long, he was almost asleep.

"Put your jammies back on, J, just in case anyone comes in." Our parents were pretty good in terms of our privacy, but Charlie, in her innocence, was occasionally prone to wandering into our room unannounced, albeit not in the middle of the night.

"OK, Cam," he said sleepily. "Can we snuggle all night, like we used to, though?"

"It'll be a bit of a tight fit, but yeah, of course we can, if it's what you want." We organised our bedclothes and switched the nightlight off before quickly finding a comfortable orientation and saying our goodnights. I don't know about Joey, but I was out like a light within seconds.

****

I was awakened by Joey trying carefully, but ultimately unsuccessfully, to avoid disturbing me.

"Morning, J," I mumbled.

"Oh poo, I was doing my best to not bother you, but I'm desperate for a pee!"

"That makes two of us! Shall we share?!" The two of us, in typical little boy fashion, often relieved our bladders together, until Joey's 'nude-phobia' problems began. He was obviously remembering those days, because he grinned ear to ear.

"I'd almost forgotten that! Having 'swordfights' with our pee! It's like that old programme, what was it called?"

"All Our Yesterdays?" I volunteered.

"That was the one! Dad used to like the show, he said it reminded him of being a boy himself. Anyway, I've got to go, right now! Come on, we could even have a swordfight!"

We could, and we did, laughing like drains - no pun intended! As we got back to our room, Joey cocked his ear, trying to work out where our other family members were. "Mum and Charlie are in the kitchen, I think, Dad will be at work, unless anything out of the ordinary has happened, and Lisa will still be asleep, probably, since it's not a school day." My brother smiled slightly, in a conspiratorial fashion. "I reckon we're safe to play some more, if you want. What do you think?"

To steal Oscar Wilde's famous quote, I could resist anything except temptation. We didn't have a lock or bolt in our bedroom, so I suggested that I should sit on the floor by the door, to block anyone from coming in, while Joey could sit on my lap, from where I could easily caress his boyhood. He was all for that, needless to say, and within ten minutes, he was climaxing once more.

"Mmmm, Cam, that was so nice! Thanks! It's your turn now, though, I owe you one from last night already! How do you want to do it?"

"You don't owe me anything, J, I promise you that. Making you feel good is more than enough reward, honestly. But if you really don't mind, I could stay sitting here, and you could kneel down beside me. That should keep you from getting my sperm all over you, but if you're still worried about that, I'll tell you when I'm close, and I can finish myself up with my own hand."

"I don't mind about your sperm, it'll wash, won't it?"

"To a point, but it can stain your clothes if you're not careful. You can wash stuff that gets too manky in the washing machine, but Mum would probably know what the stains meant. She's no fool! There is one thing I've got, though, I'll show you. Lift up for a minute!"

I rummaged in my wardrobe, producing an old cloth bag. "It's my plimsoll bag from primary, but it's got a big hole at the bottom. Mum told me to throw it away, but I thought it might do for something. And I was right. Look inside!"

"It's one of those really old towels we used to have," Joey observed.

"Yep, I found it in the airing cupboard. It's full of holes, but that doesn't matter for this. I use it to wipe my sperm off, and because it's a towel, it's easy to rinse it through in the bathroom, and then dry it. It's not completely clean, but it's OK, especially at the moment, because I don't....wank myself that often now, Suzy usually doesn't mind doing it for me. She uses tissues instead, most of the time, and flushes them down the toilet." 

"Wank? What does that mean? James called some kid at school 'a wanker', but I didn't know why."

"It's a slang word for rubbing your dick. The proper word is masturbate, but no-one says that, apart from people like teachers or doctors. And 'wanker' is an insult word, it sort-of means calling them a loser, telling them that they can't find a girlfriend, or whatever, so the only thing they can do is to wank themselves instead."

 "Oh," my brother said with slight concern in his voice. "Does that mean we're wankers, because we play with our dicks?"

"Joey, trust me - there are only two sorts of boys, of our sort of age, those who admit they wank, and the others who lie about it! Everybody does it! And I bet boys have been doing it a hundred years ago, a thousand years ago, even ten thousand years and more ago! And do you know why?" He shook his head. "Because it feels so good!" Joey laughed out loud. We both jumped immediately, as someone rapped on our door. It was Mum.

"What's so funny in there, you pair?"

"Only telling jokes, Mum," I called back.

"Not rude ones, I hope. Anyway, do you know it's nearly 9 o'clock, don't you want any breakfast?"

"We're just getting dressed. we'll be down in a couple of minutes."

The footsteps in the hallway receded. "That was a close one! We'd better hurry up now, or she'll be suspicious."

"Awww, that means you're going to miss out again, Cam!"

"Don't worry about it, I won't! My time will come - in more ways than one!" Joey was still giggling at my double entendre five minutes later, when we arrived in the kitchen.

****

I wasn't able to see Suzy that day. Jim worked weekends from time to time, when he was given compensatory days off in the week. And that was one of those days. It affected Joey, as well, because James and his father had gone off somewhere together in their car, but no-one knew when they we likely to come back, meaning that it was too risky for me to visit my still ailing girl, if they turned up unexpectedly. Joey had called for Jools and Jen instead, but there was nobody home, leaving my brother and I at a loose end. At length, we decided to walk to the seafront - the weather was bright and breezy, but decidedly chilly, and as a result, the promenade was virtually deserted. We threw a few pebbles into the water, but that got boring in a hurry, especially with the wind whipping through our light jackets. We took refuge in one of the promenade shelters, chatting desultorily for a few minutes, before Joey looked at me with more purpose.

"Cam....I want to tell you about that stuff I mentioned last night, you know, about me being scared to get undressed in front of people, and all that. But before I tell you, I want you to promise that you won't tell anyone else, or do anything....crazy. Because I think you'll be really angry. So will you promise, please?"

I was on edge, straight away. "I don't know, J, it sounds very....serious. If it's that bad, Mum and Dad should be involved."

"Dad knows, he was the one who....found out. It's all sorted out now, but it's taken me ages to....deal with what happened. But he wanted me to be careful about telling anyone else, especially...." He faltered, looking at me pensively.

"Me? Why?" 

"Because I don't want you to be in trouble, in case you do anything mad. You're the most important person in my life, and I need you to be around for me. I want to tell you about what happened, but....oh poo, this is difficult. I need to trust you over all this stuff, Cam, help me, please, please!"

He looked so forlorn, to the extent that my only instinct was to scoop him up into my arms, hugging him closely.

"I promise, Joey, it's obvious how much you're struggling. I'd be a terrible brother if I didn't do everything in my power to try to make things better for you. Tell me as much as you want. I can't promise that I won't be angry, because someone has hurt you badly, but I promise I won't do anything....physical to harm that person."

"OK, Cam, I trust you." He closed his eyes, before sighing deeply. "It all started when I was 6, nearly 7. I'd just had a bath, and I was drying myself, when...." He shuddered. "When she came into the bathroom. She burst out laughing. 'What's that ugly, stringy worm doing between your legs!' She pointed to my....dick, although I called it my willy then. 'You're a freak, Philip. No-one has bits like that. You should be sent to a zoo!' She was always calling me Philip, just because she knew I didn't like that name. She pinched my dick, really hard. It hurt, a lot, and I started to cry. 'Shut up, you baby! And don't tell anyone, or I'll do it every day. Or I'll chop it off, and feed it to the birds - they eat worms all the time!' That was the start of it - she started to poke, scratch and pinch me, pull my pants down, every time we were alone, especially in the bathroom. I hated it, but she was bigger than me, and I was scared. What if she really cut my dick off? I didn't know what to do, so I stopped going to the bathroom, or letting anyone see me....down there. Eventually Dad fixed up the bolt on the door, but I still didn't tell anyone, so she just carried on."

"Lisa?" I'd guessed immediately, of course, but his shamefaced demeanour was the confirmation. I was seething with rage, but I'd made my promise to my brother. "Why didn't you tell me?" I asked as gently as I could. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Like I said, I was scared. And she was clever about it, she made sure no-one saw, and only called me names when no-one could hear. She told me no-one would believe me if I told, and that I would be the who would be in trouble, for telling lies. It happened for so long, Cam, but I could never break free from it."

"But you said that it got sorted out in the end. How?"

"Dad caught her red-handed, pulling my trousers and pants down and calling me her usual names, one day in the summer holidays, not this year, but last year. She'd forgotten that Dad was on the first day of his works holiday, and he heard me crying. He was absolutely furious, he smacked her loads of times. I'd never seen him smack any of us, ever, Mum did that occasionally, but even she doesn't do that now. Once the smacking stopped, and Lisa stopped wailing, he told us both to tell the whole truth about what had gone on. Lisa tried to pretend it was just a one-off joke, and that I was making everything else up, but Dad didn't believe a word of that, especially when he looked at my....bits, there were scratches and little bruises where she'd pinched me. He was so angry, I thought he was going to smack her again, but he just managed to control himself, he told me afterwards. He told Lisa if she ever did anything to me again, he'd take her to the police, and have her arrested for sexual assault. She must've believe him, because it's never happened since. She hardly ever even talks to me now, but that doesn't bother me in the slightest. Dad apologised to me for not helping me sooner, he checks that I'm OK regularly now. And I am OK, I think - a lot better, at least. Playing with the girls, and now with you, too, gives me the confidence that I'm not a freak, and that special people will like, even love me. It got to the stage that I thought I would be on my own forever, but now I don't think like that."

"I'm pleased, Joey, but I still wish you could've told me about her....bullying, and the horrible things she was doing to you. One thing is certain, though, you were right to make me promise not to do anything to her - I would've killed her, literally."

"Dad was afraid of that, too. You and him are really similar, you're both really calm and easy-going, almost all of the time, but when you're in a temper, you're dangerous!" He grinned briefly, but he was quickly back into serious mode. "Please stay away from her, Cam, I need you in my life everyday, not being thrown into prison forever. I couldn't cope with that."

I slipped my arm over his shoulders once more. "I couldn't cope with that, either, J. Do you want to carry talking, or shall we go home and find some lunch?"

Right on cue, I heard his stomach rumble. "It's definitely lunchtime!" I laughed. 

****

By the Thursday, Suzy was feeling a bit better, well enough, at least, for her to come to our house. James, Jools and Jen came as well, but my mum and sisters were at home, too, so there was no chance for them - or Suzy and I - to do anything other talk or play board games. The 4Js eventually went out to do their own thing, despite the cold weather, while Lisa went to see Hayley, leaving my girl and I, as well as Charlie, to play draughts in the warmth of the living room. It was just nice to be close to her, especially when we managed to sneak a couple brief cuddles - Charlie giggled happily to see our romantic moments. I won't tell, my little sister whispered, with an adorable little wink. Eventually, Suzy was starting to tire as lunchtime approached, so I walked her home, she was more than ready to have a nap. The following day was cold, grey and drizzly, so, once more, we weren't able to meet up, but Saturday morning was completely different - it was sunny, and much milder. Best of all, Suzy looked 100% brighter than the previous few days when she knocked on our door, not long after breakfast time.

"Fancy a walk?" she said with a smile. I had my shoes and jacket on in a trice. At my girl's instance, we were soon heading up the steep hill towards the castle. Suzy was carrying a large carrier bag, which intrigued me.

"Shall I carry that?" I asked her.

"You can if you like, but it's not heavy. It's only an old blanket Mum told me I could use. Something we can sit on, if the grass is damp."

"Where are you thinking of going?"

"That place we went to in the summer, by the parade grounds. We can't have all the way sex, because I'm still a bit leaky, so I'm wearing a pad, but we can kiss and cuddle, and I can make you feel good. You deserve it, for being such a good boyfriend. I bet you're ready for a good come!"

I smiled rather sheepishly. She didn't remark about my slight lack of enthusiasm, but in truth I was feeling very guilty. What she didn't know, needless to say, was that Joey and I had been sharing our bodies all week, even experimenting with oral sex, something Suzy and I had never done together - she thought using our tongues and lips on each other's genitalia was 'too yucky'. 

We settled into a grassy hollow, close to where we'd made love two months earlier. Suzy kissed me avidly, and I tried my best to reciprocate, but I was feeling like an utter fraud. As soon as my girl started to palpate my still fully-clothed erection, I stopped her dead. She was dumbfounded initially, but within seconds, she was easily able to see the fact that I was crying.

"Cam! What's the matter? Have I hurt you?" I shook my head, unsteadily, but I wasn't able to speak at that moment. "Please me what the problem is, I want to help," she said in the most caring way, which made me feel even worse, to the extent that I began sobbing like a toddler. Suzy held me close, but it was probably five minutes before I was able to pull myself together, even slightly.

"I'm so sorry, Suzy. Y....you haven't done anything wrong. I....I'm the problem."

"What do you mean?"

"I....I think I'm....a queer. A homo! I love you to bits, you're my best friend, but....but I think I prefer....boys." Suzy's expression was a complex mixture of shock and hurt, but also of empathy and, yes, love, unmistakable love.

"I don't understand, Cam. Can you try to explain how this has happened, so suddenly?"

"It's not sudden, Suzy, it's been suppressed, instead. By fear, mostly." I began to talk. And talk. Suzy did ask a few questions in between, but most of the following hour was me pouring my heart out about my emotions, my sexuality. Going back to when I was very young, no more than 7 or 8, when I had two very close friends at school, one who was 5 or 6, then later another who was my own age, both of them moving away due to their respective fathers taking new jobs, leaving me heartbroken on both occasions. Neither friendship had an overt sexual component - I had virtually no idea about any sort of sex, let alone homosexuality, in my primary school years - but when puberty started to creep above my personal horizon, along with the extra knowledge senior school afforded, my doubts and fears about my orientation loomed large. There were boys at school who were starting attract my attention, one in particular, a lovely blond with blue eyes, who was a year younger than me, and who I pined for what seemed to be forever, rather than the almost two years, in reality, that was the case. And as the coup de grace, I told Suzy about Joey, what I'd recently discovered, what he'd been enduring at Lisa's hands, about my feelings for him and his for me, including our mutual sexual awakening. 

"That's the reason I was so upset earlier," I told her, "the last week has....changed things. I've always loved him, as a brother, and he's loved me just as much, but now, I think I'm in love with him. It's so confusing, especially when I believe I'm still in love with you, too."

Suzy looked at me for long, long seconds, a completely unreadable expression on her face. Then she leaned over, giving me a brief peck on the lips.

"I love you too, Cam, but I need to work out what all this means. For me, for you, for both of us. Let me go home now, please don't follow me, I'll be OK, don't worry that I'm going to do anything....silly. When I've thought about everything, I'll come and see you. I don't know when yet, but I promise it won't be too long."

She folded the blanket up, put it in the carrier bag, and then walked away, without looking back. I didn't cry, I just felt numb. I gave her a ten minute head start before heading home, in a different direction. The next chapter was going to be a mystery, I said to myself. I just hoped it wasn't going to be a tragedy.

****

"Some things never change, do they?! You're still an old perv!"

"I love you, too!" I replied smartly. "If I'm that bad, why are you still around?!"

"Someone's got to, to save the world from your iniquities!"

I'd been watching a YouTube video of a junior diving competition. I'd been a fan of the sport since I was a teenager, in the Olympics and elsewhere on TV, but I couldn't deny that my choice of viewing at that moment was little more than an excuse to enjoy some 'eye candy' - some of the pubescent boys, with their lithe, athletic bodies, were simply beautiful to behold.

"Anyway, how come you're back so soon?"

"The podiatrist had to go home with a tummy bug, so the appointment was postponed. They've given me a new date, next week, and they were very apologetic, but it's still a bit of a pain. It's a good job I'm finally retired now!"

****

2026. Where did all that time go? More than fifty years since that unforgettable, halcyon blue-sky summer of 1975, when so much changed in my life. I was retired, too, and had been for nearly seven years, after a stroke had abruptly ended my reasonably successful career as an industrial scientist. One thing that had never changed, though, was living in my home town. There had been a handful of 'sliding doors' moments over the years - I almost moved to London for university, but ended up at the University of Kent instead, I'd been shortlisted for jobs, on two seperate occasions, first in the Midlands and then in East Anglia, but neither had come to fruition. And then finally, after working for the same company, fifteen miles away, for 25 years, I'd been made redundant, but the internet was in full swing by then, so I became a self-employed consultant, working from home (albeit with much more travel than I would've chosen in an ideal world).

Perhaps more surprising than my 'stay at home' lifestyle was the fact that all of my siblings, and most of our closest friends, also chose to remain close by. The only signifcant absentees were Jools and Jen, who moved away when they were 13, because their father, who was a college lecturer, was appointed to a senior post - in Canada! Joey was very sad to see them go, James not so much - his pubertal hormones were already at boiling point, and he was most aggrieved that neither girl would relieve him of his virginity! My brother kept in touch with the twins, initially in the way of being pen friends, then later by e-mail and eventually through social media, and still does.

James and his....enthusiasm (I was tempted to say obsession, but that would've been a little harsh) for sex shaped his life for the best part of ten years. He'd always been highly-sexed, even as a prepubescent youngster, and that was enhanced all the more as he entered his teenage years. He had a string of girlfriends, mostly acquired at school, but most, if not all, of his coevals fought shy of his relentless quest to achieve full intercourse with a girl. In the end, he decided that somewhat older females would be a better bet, and he was proved correct, finally engaging with a 15 year old (one of Lisa's friends, oddly enough) not long after his thirteenth birthday. He was ecstatic, Joey had told me later, but the relationship soon foundered, the girl finding him too demanding. Nothing daunted, he quickly gained a reputation as a 'stud', the school grapevine characterising him as a skilful and indefatigable lover, but one who was more than a little unreliable - he thought of nothing to have two, three or even more partners 'on the go' at a time. He did have a few slightly longer liaisons, though, and one of those proved to be his undoing. He'd been with a girl called Kelly for almost six months, pretty much an all-time record for him, when he was 19 and she was 18, but it went pear-shaped for him - she fell pregnant. The strong suspicion was that she'd tricked him into fatherhood - her immediate priority was trying to get a council flat for her and the forthcoming baby, unsuccessfully in the first instance, so she started to demand that James should pay for a suitable private rental property instead. He'd always worked after leaving school, but his educational qualifications were modest, so his options for a higher-paying job were limited. He became depressed, making his prospects even more parlous, losing two jobs within weeks. But just as things were at his lowest ebb, Kelly suffered a miscarriage. The young woman was distraught, naturally, but James was relieved beyond words. His relationship with Kelly, such as it was, disintegrated completely, her family making all manner of threats about his wellbeing, leading to several months of uncertainty, but, eventually, things started to calm down. And a totally different James emerged from that traumatic phase. He applied himself, finding a better job, albeit not one that paid much better at first, took night school courses, and was soon, at 22, promoted as a supervisor. Best of all, for everyone, he found a delightful, intelligent and beautiful long-term partner - my little sister, Charlie, who was 18 at that time. She had breezed through her school career, being selected for a grammar school place without the least difficulty, and was soon being earmarked for university. But as A-Levels approached, she took a different path, choosing instead to train as a hospital nurse, qualifying as an RGN three years later, soon specialising in maternity care. A further year later, in the spring of 1991, Charlie and James were married, moving into a two-bedroom terraced house in our town. They decided that they would like to have a child together, but only one, the child proving to be a daughter, Jessica, her name being almost instantly shortened to Jess, who was born in 1995. The little family were blissfully happy, the only major disruption being James losing his job, when his company relocated to Northern Ireland, of all places, but he soon bounced back, using his redundancy package to qualify as a driving instructor. Very successfully, I might add, he really enjoyed the work, and his pupils loved him, with his light-hearted but rigorous approach paying dividends for all concerned. Before too long, the trio were able to move to a nicer area, buying a three-bedroom semi, close to green fields at the edge of town, but after extensive conversations, still chose not to have another child. Jess was a bright little girl from the start, both in terms of personality and intellect, another grammar school product and, later on, another graduate, her degree was in environmental science. And it got even better, when she achieved a PhD in 2022, allowing her to call herself Dr Jess! We were all very proud of her, needless to say.

Jess wasn't the first of my group of nephews and nieces, though - Hayley and Lisa both had two children before that. Hayley had plenty of boyfriends in her teens, but none who was 'the one' for her. At 20, though, she met Ray, a no-nonsense firefighter, and they clicked almost at once. They were engaged within nine months, and married a year later, in 1983. Two children soon appeared, Daniel in 1985, and Sarah eighteen months later. Both have children of their own now, two boys, Andrew and Bradley, for Daniel and his wife Michelle, while Sarah and her husband Mark have one daughter, Kelsey. Lisa's matrimonial path proved be a lot rockier, but to be fair to her, the vast majority of the problems in her first marriage were caused by her then husband, Simon. He was a 'bad boy' from his early teens - my parents literally begged my sister to avoid him like the plague. but she'd fallen in love, heavily, ignoring his many faults for many years. They got married in their early twenties, and within a bare year, they had a son, Simon Junior. By the time he went to school, it was becoming clear that he was going to be a fey, slightly effeminate boy, and as a result, his father loathed him. The crux came when he was 7, when he was caught kissing one of his male classmates. The elder Simon went berserk, beating his son to the extent that the little boy spent two days in hospital. Lisa threw her husband out (he was later arrested and convicted for the assault, serving two years in jail), and the marriage was over. Not long after the divorce had been finalised, my sister had got together with a man who she'd known from school, and less than a year, she remarried. Her second husband, Gordon, was, and is, a very quiet and inoffensive guy, happy to take his stepson on his own terms. As was the case with her first marriage, Lisa had another child less than a year later, this time a daughter, called Fleur. Simi, as he wanted to be called after the attack by his father, became a very creative individual, excelling in art and design, and also no mean musician, either, learning to play piano, clarinet and, later, guitar. For all his seeming to be an obvious candidate for a gay life, he had never had a boyfriend, and, in fact, he ultimately identified himself as straight, in his late teens. He met his partner, Claire, at art school, and they live a thoroughly bohemian life in London. 

So what about me, and the two very special people I professed to love, on that autumn Saturday, all those years ago? Joey was an absolute rock for me, despite his tender years, in the immediate aftermath of my discussion with Suzy. When I wanted to talk, he listened attentively, if I wanted his thoughts, he always gave me the truth, good or bad, and when I broke down and cried, which happened more than once, he was always there for a hug, or a tissue to wipe my eyes. We didn't have any sort of sex in those following days, but he shared my bed almost every night, his warmth and his distinctive aroma, sweet and boyish, was an immeasurable comfort for me. I'd had no contact at all from Suzy, by the start of the next weekend, but that quickly changed on the Saturday morning, almost exactly seven days since our fateful walk.

"Hello Cam," she said quietly, when I'd opened the front door. "It's nice to see you again. Is Joey at home?" I nodded rather nervously. "Do you think he'd be prepared to take a walk with us? Just the three of us?"

"I'd have to ask, but I think he would." Suzy looked hopeful. "I'll ask him now."

He was in our bedroom, looking for warm clothes - I suspect he was intending to visit James, or the twins, or both.

"Suzy's here. She would like the three of us to have a walk together. Are you up for that?"

"D....does she look....angry?"

"Not at all, she seems....very calm. I think she wants to talk to both of us."

There was a long hiatus, before he sighed, deeply. "O....OK, but if it turns nasty, I'll go back home, straight away."

"That's fine, J. I might do the same." I gave him a warm hug. "If you want my gut feeling, I think it'll be OK."

He nodded, finished organising his winter togs, and came back downstairs with me.

"We're ready, Suzy. Where do you want to go?" I asked.

"The big park should be quiet. With any luck, we'll be able to snag one of the shelters at the end of the tennis courts. Shall we go?"

It only took fifteen minutes or so before we arrived. As Suzy had predicted, the park was virtually deserted, apart from a couple of dog walkers. We settled into the shelter, the girl arranged us so that I was on her right, and Joey on the left.

"I've been thinking long and hard about what Cam said last week," Suzy said. "Did he tell you about all of it, Joey?"

"I....I don't know if he told me absolutely everything, but the stuff about him liking boys, and loving both of us, yeah, I know those things."

"What did you think?"

"I....I can see why he's confused. But that would never stop me from loving him. And I'm not worried at all that he loves me, as a brother, and....someone to do sex things with."

The girl smiled faintly. "You're very brave and honest, Joey. And I need to be brave and honest, too. Cam knows this already, but before we decided to be boyfriend and girlfriend, I used to play with James. For quite a few months. My brother and I both really liked it, neither of us were forcing the other to do anything we didn't like. I know for sure that Cam would never force you to do anything, especially when he told me about the stuff about what Lisa did." The boy blushed, deeply. "You've got nothing to be ashamed of, and I would never tell anyone else. One thing I would mind asking, though - do you think you might like boys, or do you prefer girls, mostly?" Joey didn't say anything, initially. "If you don't want to say, that's completely up to you. But it might give me a clue about what to do about Cam."

"I love him, Suzy, and I love the stuff we did at half-term. But I've never thought about doing anything with any other boy, not even James, and he's my best friend by miles." He paused once more. "I've done a little bit of stuff with Jools and Jen, that was really fun. So, when I think about it, although I'm not 100% certain yet, I think I prefer girls."

The girl ruffled Joey's hair gently. "Thank you for telling me that, Joey," She turned to me. "I went to the library again the other day, after school. That book I've told you about before was still there, and I read some stuff I hadn't seen before. Have you ever heard about bisexuality?" I shook my head. "What it is, most people, 90% or more, like the opposite sex, and there are some, maybe 5%, who prefer the same sex. That's called homosexuality. But there are a few, and no-one for sure know how many, according to the book, who like both. That's bisexuality. You've done stuff with me, and with Joey, and enjoyed both. I reckon you could be bisexual!"

It wasn't exactly a lightbulb moment for me, but it was something to think about, for sure. "That's interesting, but I still don't know what it means for me, you, all three of us. I definitely know I love both of you, and I never want to lose that love and friendship. But the sex part of it is....all muddled in my mind. Maybe the best thing is to forget the sex, and concentrate on being the best brother, and the best friend I can."

"But it feels so good!" Joey grinned.

"I second that, Cam," the girl smirked, "and you're so good at it, too!" I smiled sheepishly.

"So what's the answer to this riddle?" 

"How about that we carry on in the way we've been doing recently? I can do stuff with you, you and Joey can do stuff together, and Joey can do stuff with the twins. We can all be honest with each other, and you, Mr Campbell Parker, don't need to have a nervous breakdown every other day about who you like!"

I felt like the world was suddenly a far brighter place. "And you, Miss Susanna Milton, are a bloody genius! Can I give you a huge kiss, please?!"

"I'd be very disappointed if you don't!"

****

Joey, Suzy and I carried on with our unusual threesome for more than a year, but, ultimately, it was my brother who pulled the pin. He'd earned a place at my school, somewhat surprisingly for some (teachers, in particular), but I always knew he was good enough to get there, as long as he applied himself, which he did. On Christmas Eve, though, after we'd had a very satisfying hour of oral sex together, he dropped the bombshell.

"Cam...." he whispered timidly, "I want to stop the sex stuff. Don't worry, you haven't done anything wrong, everything has been awesome, but....I've got more and more scared lately of what might happen if we ever got caught. We've been really lucky, but one mistake could ruin everything. You know what our school is like, even a rumour about someone being....queer, and dozens of people pile in. And if Lisa found out, let alone Mum and Dad, she would tell everyone in the whole of Great Britain! I'm really sorry, Cam, but I think it's too risky. And besides," he smiled wryly, "you're getting really big, and I'm growing as well! Your bed might collapse soon, with both of us in it!"

I chuckled. "All your growth is concentrated in that anaconda in your pants! I bet you'll be coming wet any day now!" 

"If I do, I'll let you watch! I know you would love to see it! I'm definitely not giving up wanking, either, that's for certain!"

"That makes two of us!" I kissed his cheek, making him shiver. "I love you so much, Joey. I can't imagine that there's a better brother, anywhere in the world! Come on, let's try to go to sleep, Charlie will be up at about 5 o'clock in the morning, you know what she's like at Christmas!" He went back to his own bed, and it wasn't long before I could hear the familiar cadence of his breathing, as he fell asleep. I sighed inwardly. I was bitterly disappointed that our sexy fun had come to an end, but I would've died before giving him the slightest hint at my sorrow. I still had my beloved brother as one of my best friends, and I still had my wonderful girl, as well. How could I have been so lucky?

****

I told Suzy, the day after Boxing Day, about Joey's decision. She was sympathetic, as ever, but also concerned about what, if anything, I was planning to do to deal with my 'same-sex' attractions. 

"I don't really know," I told her. "I still like the looks of a few boys at school, but I don't know any of them to speak to, let alone whether if any of them would want to....play sexy with me."

"What about your friends, boys in your form, people like that?" the girl asked me.

"That's a big part of the problem. I don't find any of them attractive, really. It's only the....younger ones, Joey's age, or maybe a year or so older, that I....fancy. And I'm definitely not interested in the older ones, like sixth-formers, or....actual men, adults, I mean, they don't do anything for me, at all."

She looked at me uneasily. "That could be....a problem. There's a lot of stuff in the papers lately, especially trashy ones, like The Sun, about....paedophiles. How they should be....thrown in jail, or even killed. Have you seen any of that?"

"A bit, yeah. Dad buys The Daily Mirror, mostly, but they've written about that, too. I haven't thought about it much, though. Most of it seems like it's them slagging off creepy men who want to hurt kids. We're still kids ourselves, so it doesn't apply to us, as far as I'm concerned."

"Cam, look in the mirror! You're six feet tall, you're built like a rugby player! If one of those pondlife Sun readers saw you hanging around with a boy Joey's age, God knows what they could do!" The pain in her eyes was clear. "I'm scared for you, Cam, I don't want you to get hurt."

That brief conversation has shaped a huge part of my subsequent life. Suzy's apprehension crystallised a feeling I was already struggling with, albeit mostly unconsciously at first. So I did the only thing I believed I could do - I became deeply closeted in terms of my attraction to boys. By the time I was 17 or 18, I began to avoid any contact with boys at all, apart from family members. I was ridiculously lucky in having Suzy and Joey in my corner, they were both more than willing to help with any problems around my sexuality, and still do to this day. You could say that they've saved me from myself, because without their love and support, there's a more than even chance that I could've been tempted by 'forbidden fruit', and ended up in prison, or worse.

Joey, as he entered his teenage years, was the polar opposite of his 'bestie' James - they were still more or less inseperable, despite their moving to different schools at 11. Once Jools and Jen disappeared from his everyday life, my brother didn't seem to be the least interested acquiring a girlfriend, concentrating on his school work instead. I discussed the situation with him occasionally, my concern being that he was conflicted about the things we had done together, but he shrugged it off - I just want to work hard so I can get to a good university, he told me, there'll be plenty of time for fun stuff when that's all sorted out. His single-minded determination paid off handsomely - his academic passion was geology, and he earned a place at Imperial College in London, at that time the most prestigious establishment to study the subject. He was absolutely thrilled when the comfirmatory letter arrived, whooping with glee.

"I've done it, I've done it, Cam! What time do the pubs open?! I reckon it's party time!" He was 18 by then, so a lunchtime pub crawl certainly would've been completely legal for all of us, with the exception of Charlie, but after a few phone calls, he decided to wait until the evening, some people were working, most significantly James. 

Despite Joey's morning exuberance, the soiree was relatively restrained, albeit a little noisy, at times. None of us habitually drank to excess (although I'd had my moments, over the years!), the overall atmosphere was happy and friendly, but not at all raucous. There were a few couples in attendance, Suzy and I, of course, James and his current girlfriend, and two of Joey's schoolfriends and their belles. As the evening progressed, I noticed that my brother was chatting to one of my girl's close friends from their school years, Maddy. I knew her slightly, and so did Joey, seemingly. Suzy had told me that Maddy was another high-flyer, academically, she was just about to embark on her third year at King's College in Central London, studying modern languages. By the time everyone was ready to go home, Joey was positively glowing.

"Maddy's really interesting, Cam. She's amazingly clever, maybe even more intelligent than you, and that's really saying something! She lives in one of the villages, her Dad gave her a lift back home tonight, but she can usually get to and fro on the train, the station is less than a mile from her house. We're going to have a coffee together in the morning." I grinned, ear to ear.

"That's great J. I hope you have a good time!"

So another one of the jigsaw pieces fell into place. Not quite love at first sight, but in the same vicinity, at least. Joey and Maddy were 'an item' from that first evening, and are still, after more than 40 years. They didn't get married, oddly enough, they decided that wasn't necessary for them, but they did have a child, and what a child! 

Adam Benedict Parker-Sutton, Ads for short, although he called himself Ben occasionally, when the fancy caught him, was born in 1992. He was absolutely beautiful, right from a baby, but his intellect was always his strongest suit. He could hold an almost adult conversation by two years old, learned to read - taught himself to read, more or less, as I had done, thirty years earlier - at three and a half, spoke four languages fluently by 8 (that was the maternal DNA, no doubt!) and could play piano and flute by 9. He could also sing, dance and act, and even the rough and tumble of sport wasn't an issue, he ran like the wind, swam like a fish, and was a star junior rower before his teens (his grandfather was a stalwart of the local rowing club). A veritable pre-teen polymath, in short. He totally overwhelmed everyone, teachers and his classmates alike, at the local village primary school (Joey and Maddy managed to buy a house nearby, thanks to a generous boost from the Bank of Mum and Dad!), before earning a full scholarship to our town's public school, where he predictably thrived. His educational qualifications were nothing short of stellar, A and A* throughout, and he could easily have found an Oxbridge place, but he chose the University of Southampton instead, marine biology being his preferred discipline.

And he was also a pioneer, in terms of our family circle, being the first openly gay person in our lives, despite his 'all-boy' looks and demeanour. He came out on his eleventh birthday, and never wavered in that regard, disappointing literally dozens of eager tween and later teen girls! Like his father, he largely concentrated on his education, he did have one or two low-level romances at school, but it wasn't until he went to university that he found a serious boyfriend. Unfortunately, the young man, Kyle, broke his heart two years later, cheating on Ads (Kyle must've been mad or blind, or maybe both, in my opinion!) with not one but two of their mutual friends. The betrayal rocked my nephew to the core, and it was a good four years before he came to terms with what had happened. At length, though, he tentatively dipped his toe back into the relationship pond, meeting Kelvin through rowing. After a slow start, they eventually committed fully, becoming long-term partners, closing on their tenth anniversary. They're seriously considering adopting one or maybe even two children, although nothing has been finalised yet.

So, it's time for the big denouement. I'm sure you'll be waiting with bated breath (or not, most likely!) for the last chapter. I think I've given enough hints, but, yes, Suzy and I are still together, and always have been. 51 years, even longer if you count our status as childhood best friends, but let's say 51 years, since that sweltering Saturday afternoon in the old garage, where we consummated our love. You've heard about my employment history, but not Suzy's - she went to teacher training college, qualifying as an English teacher in 1984. Three years later, she achieved her ultimate aim, being appointed to a post at her old school, the girls' grammar in our town. And she stayed there for the duration, eventually being promoted to head of the English department, and, for the last few years of her career, as Deputy Head. She retired a year ago, 'happily doing nothing, after all these years' as she says with a smile. We got engaged when Suzy was 18 and I was 19, with Jim still refusing to accept the validity of our relationship - he spurned our engagement party - although he did attend our wedding, very reluctantly (there was a strong rumour that Helen was threatening divorce if he didn't), nearly five years later - we decided to wait until our respective education had completely ended, and ultimately, everything went swimmingly on the day. Not so in terms of adding to the family 'baby boom', though - after extensive testing, it transpired that both Suzy and I were unable to have children of our own. It was a major disappointment in our lives (although I was uneasy about the prospect of having a son, given my sexuality, but that proved moot), we did discuss adoption briefly, but both of us decided it wasn't what we wanted. We settled for trying to be the best the aunt and uncle we could for our assorted nieces and nephews, and now that the next generation is in full swing, being great aunt and uncle for the younger contingent. 

****

"Penny for your thoughts," Suzy said, fondly, as we enjoyed the last rays of a summer evening in the balcony of our sea front flat.

"Oh, just a bit of nostalgia, I suppose. This latest heatwave has reminded of 1975, to a degree."

"Slipping into your dotage, are you?! You'll have to find your own carer, I've got better things to do!"

"If I ever need a carer, I'll drown myself in the harbour! And anyway, what would you do without your personal cook and bottle washer?!" Suzy had never been a good cook, and was more than happy to delegate me to provide our meals. On the other hand, I'd never enjoyed cleaning, so that was my girl's province. Anything else, we shared. "We've done alright between us, haven't we?" I smiled.

"More, far more, than just alright, Cam. It's been wonderful! And I hope there are many good years still to come."

"Seconded! I love you so much, Suzy."

"And I love you just as much."

We kissed passionately, not for the first time. And, hopefully, not for the last.

****

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B