Generations

For K, hoping always that you find the happiness that has eluded me

****

We're facing in different directions
Where once we walked hand in hand
Your eyes looking up to the hopes of the future
Mine cast down at mistakes of my past

Once upon a time I had dreams
Thought I'd find the fulfillment of love
But they proved to be one big illusion
Washed away by the cruel tide of life

Now you're entwined in the arms of your lover
Your joyfulness clear in your face
I still wish you the best for your own sake
While I face nothing but death, all alone

****

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

Only

For DBJ, with love, always

****

"You're the only one, you know that, don't you?"

No word of reply, how could there be, in the face of such a revelation. His eyes snapped shut, a deep, unconscious sigh escaped his lips, punctuating the glutinous silence.

"I wanted to tell you, but I just couldn't. I could never find the right words. The time was never right. And....I didn't want to believe it, I suppose. I didn't want it to be true, so I pretended it wasn't."

A tear, just one, squeezed from beneath the still closed eyelid, and trickled down his cheek.

"I'm so sorry, really I am. All those times, I saw you, all those times I could have spoken, but didn't. It was too scary, too far from what society would've expected, accepted. There could've been so much happiness, but I threw it all away, just because I was afraid of making that step."

His eyes opened again, pleading, no more, no more. I can't bear any more.

"It's too late now, isn't it?"

He nodded almost imperceptibly, and then the dam broke, the tears flowed, but tears would never wash away the pain, the knowledge that it had been there, within his grasp, had he but known.

"I knew you loved me, I could see it in your eyes, every time, even when I was still at primary school I knew. I wish I could go back, live it over again, do the right thing, because....because...." The voice became a whisper. "....I loved you, too."

The young man, who had once been a beautiful boy, felt the tears fall from his own eyes as he looked down on the dying man in the hospital bed. His only love, lost forever. If only....

****

Love & best wishes to all

Sammy B

Reality

In my dreams, you're close enough to touch
In my head, there's a connection between us
In my hopes, you could save me from myself
In reality, I'm the same unlovable me, alone forever

****

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

Noosa Heads

Thanks to a very talented young man, I've woken up this morning to find that I have my first ever 'songwriting credit'. He tweaked the lyrics I wrote a little, you can hear the completed song here. This is the original version of the lyrics I wrote in January.

****

Gazing from the midnight window
City bathed in frozen moonlight
Constellations coldly shining
In the dark sky, high above me
No-one out there, nothing moving
Has the whole world died on this night
How can I have any hope left
Will I be trapped here forever

But in my dreams I see a place
Warmly peaceful, filled with beauty
Blue skies, blue sea, green the forest
White clouds slowly floating by me
Gentle waves that lap on the shore
Soft the breeze that kisses my face
Somewhere I can live as myself
Where the cruel world cannot judge me

Let the sunlight wash my soul clean
Melt the ice that chills me inside
Feel the sand beneath my footsteps
Help me escape from these cold streets
Free me, take me, please let me fly
Into the arms of the ocean
Second chance is all I'm asking
To set my soul free forever

****

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B