Only

For DBJ, with love, always

****

"You're the only one, you know that, don't you?"

No word of reply, how could there be, in the face of such a revelation. His eyes snapped shut, a deep, unconscious sigh escaped his lips, punctuating the glutinous silence.

"I wanted to tell you, but I just couldn't. I could never find the right words. The time was never right. And....I didn't want to believe it, I suppose. I didn't want it to be true, so I pretended it wasn't."

A tear, just one, squeezed from beneath the still closed eyelid, and trickled down his cheek.

"I'm so sorry, really I am. All those times, I saw you, all those times I could have spoken, but didn't. It was too scary, too far from what society would've expected, accepted. There could've been so much happiness, but I threw it all away, just because I was afraid of making that step."

His eyes opened again, pleading, no more, no more. I can't bear any more.

"It's too late now, isn't it?"

He nodded almost imperceptibly, and then the dam broke, the tears flowed, but tears would never wash away the pain, the knowledge that it had been there, within his grasp, had he but known.

"I knew you loved me, I could see it in your eyes, every time, even when I was still at primary school I knew. I wish I could go back, live it over again, do the right thing, because....because...." The voice became a whisper. "....I loved you, too."

The young man, who had once been a beautiful boy, felt the tears fall from his own eyes as he looked down on the dying man in the hospital bed. His only love, lost forever. If only....

****

Love & best wishes to all

Sammy B